"Where Are We Going?": Signs along the Journey

Often from the backseat I hear little Ainsley ask "Mama, where we are going?" I love her phrasing and the sound of her little voice as she wonders aloud just where she might be headed. I hear it so very often and truly appreciate her precious turn of phrase and the fearless wonder in her voice. But it was only a few days ago that I realized how profound a question it was. The fact that she knows that it's me, her driver, who determines just where we are going is one thing but there's more to it than that. Beyond our little ventures to the market or orchard it is largely me, her mama who decides just where we are headed in this little life. How we speak and act in front of these lovelies really does help to determine so much of who they are--where they will go. On the very best days this is wonderful enough to make my spine tingle. On the not so good days, it is intensely humbling and sobering. Sometimes the signs along the way give me a little pause either for the unexpected beauty or the unexpected warnings:

We went down to Boston for the weekend and had a fantastic time. It's such a beautiful city filled with amazing history of this great country. Seemed only fitting to see it all again on Columbus Day. When we got out of the car and felt the warm sun on our backs it was Emie who said first, "It's a great day to see somewhere new." It was Dirk who quickly added "You have your mother's spirit." I'm pretty sure my feet didn't touch the ground for the next few steps. I don't always do this mothering bit with elegance and grace -- but I'm nothing if not the eternal optimist in front of the little lambs. I'll find the silver lining in every almost every missed connection, traffic jam, and spilled beverage. But to see this penchant for the positive come from my girls-- well, that's worth a trip to the moon and back for me.

I do adore the way Emie views the world. Each day holds a promise for something magical to unfold. And from her perspective, it pretty much always does. We did see all sorts of amazing if not magical things in sweet little Beantown. The street performers at Faneuil Hall did not disappoint. Though the bare chested nipple-pierced man who put himself into a net-less badminton racquet got props for Most Unique Way to try to earn a buck - Most Entertaining easily went to these two charming blokes. They were winsome, fun, and altogether talented. Extra points for not taking the low-road with tasteless jokes and barbs. Ainsley would definitely call it magic.

Autumn full of fortune~

This turned out to be one of the best early autumn weekends I can remember. The girls were lucky enough to be invited to our new neighbors' (um, they're all new to us) kiddo's birthday party. The family has four children, three of whom are adopted. The older of the group turned two while the younger twins turned one all on the same day. Imagine the odds of being adopted into a family and sharing the same birthday with your new brother. God's so fun with details. Anyway - it was a delightful party and the best part (as predicted) was the cake. Better yet, they served cupcakes - really cute little western-themed love bundles that were very much enjoyed by Emie and Ainsley. Here's the little lovely trying to hang on to her hat while playing outside, and happily playing inside after ditching it.

And I was fortunate enough to enjoy some really good company out in sun with my neighbors who know how to throw a party. I've never been to a toddler party that served adult beverages but I'm thinking this could be a new trend. Why not keep the parentals relaxed and happy? They're such nice people, these neighbors of ours.

Sunday we checked out another new church. This one doesn't have a building and meets in a movie theater. Ainsley, as she was being dropped off into Theater 8 for child care, very matter of factly said, "I'll have a popcorn and drink, pease." There's no one like her. Perhaps the easiest drop-off to a new place we've ever had with the girls. Our transition into our first time visitor space was equally painless. We even passed by the "Free earplugs" bowl without breaking our stride. Whaa? Earplugs? Well, we weren't in there 32 seconds before it became painfully obvious what the reasoning behind those little beauties was all about. They like to make some noise for Jesus, baby! Made me wish I also had popcorn and a drink. But indeed the man could preach and we both walked away challenged to "be the church" instead of continually searching to be extra comfortable in one. Yep, we needed that message.

In the afternoon Emie had an idea for a party. At our house we call this Sunday, or Tuesday, or any day. The girl likes to celebrate e v e r y thing! Love that about her. So she asked for some colored paper and scissors and came up with this. Move over iTunes, iPhone, iPad, and allow me present to you the iTeaparty:

Seriously impressive burgeoning hostess (and lettering skills) of a kindergartner, right? Ainsley was equally excited about the prospect of going to yet another party and especially one with tea cups. A little Newman Pomegranate Lemonade (as delicious as it is pink) added just the right touch and a good time was had by all.

Later we headed out to a nearby apple orchard to snatch up some local flavor. Ainsley, plum tuckered by all of the partying, fell fast asleep before we ever arrived. Dirk snatched his laptop and got to work while Ainsley dreamed happily in the backseat. Emie and I hit the trails (and I do not use that term lightly). There was some hiking involved to get to these beauties. But as the saying goes, "If the prince wants an apple, his servants take the tree." So does this mean I'm a servant to my princess? Kinda. Happy to be when it involves making memories as sweet as these. It was a gorgeous day to hike up hills of apple orchards -- sun glinting through the leafy branches, a cool breeze on our faces. Delightful. And we have a big bag full of gems to make something wonderful. So fun. Here are a few snaps of the love next to the crates of apples the orchard sends out to the local markets.

Once we'd gathered our half-peck (as if I even knew what that was before that day) we drove out to beautiful Portsmouth. They were hosting a competitive and wonderful bike race. So fun to feel the rush of wind they created as they flew past us. Ainsley was overcome with delight at the pace of these athletes. As her mouth made a giant "O" she'd say (each time they passed) "They going so fast. So many bikes!" Maybe she enjoyed it so much because she had the best view on the street.

But truly I've never seen anything like it in person and it was a thrill. I really expected to see a yellow jersey somewhere in the crowd. Great fun!

We were fortunate enough to meet up with colleagues of Dirk's who've become friends. We enjoyed a beautiful evening overlooking the Piscataqua River that divides New Hampshire and Maine. Pretty fantastic. These times are the richest moments - the fortunes in life. To be fortunate enough to be surrounded by lovely people and a lovely God is to be fortunate enough.

Everything I need to know I learned in Kindergarten

Emie came home filled to the brim with excitement from school yesterday. She couldn't wait to tell me what she had learned in music class. "Guess what, mama! Did you know I have an instrument in my heart?" "No," I replied. "I do, it's my voice!" Indeed you do Emie girl, indeed you do.

Shrooms!

Look at what we found in our yard. It reminds me of something from a fairy tale. I love the mustard color and display of God's artistry. Ainsley and I have had a good bit of fun wandering through the woods here seeking out other beauties. We found this one which must have been wonderful the day before - but we could still appreciate the rich color even in its split apart state.

It's been quite the little metamorphosis day after day. Look what little Mr. Mustard looks like today.

And these guys just look like fresh loaves of bread to me. Ainsley's little tootsies give you a little perspective on the size of these dumplings - small caps they are not.

I think we'll skip the lesson where we taste each of them to compare their mind-altering effects. :)

Just the highlights

A week in the life:

~ Emie started Kindergarten! She was so ready. I was not. I'm reasonably sure I was the only one with any butterflies on day one. She loves her teacher, the school, and the bus ride there and back. There's nothing like turning the care of your little one over to someone else for a time, a season. Here's to the next twelve years and beyond! So happy with the school's warm philosophy, welcoming ways, and small class sizes. So good for everyone, even me:)

~ Ainsley decided to swallow Emie's "Worry Rock" a gift given to her by her kindergartner to use if she ever felt nervous. Guess Ainsley figured we're not big on worry around here so she may as well put it somewhere unreachable. Though the doctors gave us some spiffy rubber gloves to go looking for it after a fiber-filled meal.

Irene, you got some "'splainin'" to do.

I love how my last post was all about being an early settler and making my way into a new land gracefully only to be faced with the ultimate test of my pioneer spirit a few days later: A power failure. I'm pretty sure I knew this already but now I know for certain that I am not destined to live off of the land in the woods anywhere at any time.

Irene came through and rustled several things up a good bit, my pride not withstanding. Admittedly, by the time she got here we were wondering, "Is this it?" It really seemed like just a good old fashioned rain storm similar to any number we've weathered elsewhere before. But by morning (after a few quick flickers) the lights (and all things power related) went away for four days. I don't think it would have felt so long had our water not also been tied to an electrical switch. When you live in the woods, sewers are but a distant memory. So that means no flushie, no shower, no rinsing of anything until the power is restored to your septic system. Awesome.

At first we were kind of excited by the challenge to find things for the girls to do that didn't involve electronics but after countless rounds of dress-up, puzzle assembly, Go Fish, and Play-doh we were seriously jonesing for some connection to the outside world. And then at dusk to have no night light and nowhere to warm up the beloved bedtime "milkie" the adventure was getting lost on the girls as well. Truth be told they did so much better with it all than we did. They just kind of took it as a matter of fact. There's no power but we have everything we need right here. We weren't going to starve and never be seen or heard from again. Yet the grown-ups were getting restless.

The hardest part for me was not being able to reach out to anyone on the phone or computer. I was reminded (again!) just how much I rely on these wonderful conveniences to keep a sense of connection to friends and family. I was also reminded (again) how much I have that doesn't ever have to be plugged in or charged up to feel connected. Once again the little lovelies are teaching me how to live well.

To be surrounded by my precious family and know that I have a good all-powerful God always guarding over me is more than enough. But I am singing some new praises for amps and wattage all the same.

"Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself." Leo Tolstoy

Our journey toward making the biggest change for our family so far - a change of address

Oh, little blog how I've missed you! So much time has passed but we press on. I'm inclined to want to recap every little thing that's happened since I last wrote which I know is entirely impossible and is precisely why I've waited until now to even try. Never have six months been so full or so blessed for us.

What a season we're in! When I wrote last (in February!) Dirk was being heavily pursued by several head-hunters for positions all across the country. It was a good time to be a state testing director! Opportunities for our family seemed to abound yet all I wanted to do was sit nice and tight in the comfort of the familiar. In the early days of the process the idea of picking up and going to a new part of the country sounded romantic and exciting. But when the job possibilities started to transition into job offers my feet became increasingly chilly. Turns out I'd become wildly at home in good old Minnesota. Even though it took me such a long time to really settle in, make peace with winter, and connect deeply with true friends - there I was snug as a bug in our little well-oiled life. When...Bam! Time to let go of what had become familiar, tried and true, home.

Dirk was really challenging himself and had been learning so much about how we so often choose the easy way because in the end we worship comfort more than we worship God. It was an odd switch of roles to have him ready to parachute into the clouds while I wanted to retreat under the covers. Yet the nudges to move on got a little stronger and the promptings a little more obvious until it was altogether undeniable that God wanted us to move, to New England in particular.

Love in the Brew Pub

So we went out for lunch last weekend to a fun little brew pub in Saint Paul. Isn't that where preschoolers need to be on a Saturday? Well, we were downtown for a little Scottish festival that was just that: little. So when we'd seen all there was to see we came across this cute little place and thought we'd pop in for a bite.

The girls were giddy as well, girls and were so happy to be in a restaurant. Emie did not fall far from the tree and loves being served in a restaurant as much as I do. So there we were waiting for our meals and Ainsley breaks into spontaneous hugs for her sister. It wasn't just one either. It was one after the other until they both dissolved in a fit of giggles. I'm pretty sure my heart went heavenward at least for a moment or two. It just did me such good to see Ainsley love Emie back so gently and intentionally. She loves her sister. There's no doubt. Follows her like a shadow or the most loyal puppy and very much wants to mirror Emie's every move. But she isn't always so genteel in her expression of affection in her little two year old way. Emie puts up with a lot of pushing and prodding as Ainsley learns how to join in on things without hip-checking her sibling in the process. So to see her initiate a hug and not want to let go was just pure delight.

I was so happy I had my camera with me to commemorate the moment. They love each other so much, these two. I want to help them remember how early this bond started. How much they looked out for one another and looked up to one another even when they were mere babes.

I'll close with my new favorite picture of the Ainsley love. It's just her for a hundred different reasons. I love that Emie's sweet legs are in the background beneath her princess dress up clothes.

Many are the stars I see, but in my eye no star like thee...

Valentine's Day came and went and it did not disappoint. I think that's saying a lot since we often put a lot of pressure on one little day of the year to wow us like no other. I think I did plenty more of this when I was single, projecting my romantic visions everywhere I turned on February the 14th. Every couple shopping at Ralph's market was in full bliss in my mind's eye. Every man a Romeo. And everyone's plans more enviable than mine.

But now Valentine's Day is so much more to me than a day for romance. And maybe there's a wee bit of self-protection in that change of perception. Don't want to be disappointed when the limo isn't out front waiting for me with a nanny on her way to the door to take my job for the day. In any case Valentine's day to me is a day to celebrate the love in my life. And I have two little lovies in my home who like nothing more than a reason to have a celebration that actually focuses on the color pink. It doesn't get much better than that for them or for me either at this point in life.

Emie suggested we make a garland of ribbon to hang from our mantle. On it we would hang (with tiny pink clothespins) all of the Valentine cards we had received and made. It did turn out to be a most inspiring collection and a fun way to display all of the treasures. Em happily dressed in red (as per the Valentine Preschool Party requirement) and headed off to school.

While she was away Ainsley and I made lollipop cookies together. Well, she mostly helped to clean off the frosting from the beaters but it was a team effort all the same.

Happy Valentine's Day!

"I am my beloved's and my beloved is mine. . ."

Stay tuned for a recap of the Big Love party planned here for my lovies. Hope your day is sweet~